Dear Auntie Agony,
I am a student from _______ (omitted for private reasons) who come to Singapore to study in NUS, currently staying in Temasek Hall.
I think the Singapore people are very funny people. My good friends are teaching me local talk or dialect. Now I can say c*** b** and k**n**n** in a nice local accent. I think will greet the nice and friendly professors the next time I get the words correct.
However, I have big problem during my most memorable night which is the Block Supper Night.
All of us were change clothes with the girls. I became really excite. I wear a dark blue Nike shirt from the pageant girl. But I think the shirt a bit too small for me, although the chest part is just nice. Hehe.
However, I don’t know why nobody wear my favourite grey polo tee. All the guys were lie on the floor while the girls squeeze milk at us.
All the senior people shout at me and laugh and say “YOU LIKE IT RIGHT”. I was very embarrass. But I want to show I am very sport and friendly so I open my mouth to try to lick the milk. It is not very sweet like my country’s milk. There the girls don’t squeeze milk on face. They let you drink when you want to drink.
Auntie Agony, can you help teach me to clean powder milk shirt? Can you help me with this shirt?
Troubled & confused boi
* * *
Dear Troubled & Confused Boi,
The hygiene-loving ladies of Block B might just feel a tad uncomfortable if they were forced to put on your “fragrant” shirt, lest the smell bacteria decide to reside in their pores and reproduce there in the meantime.
Bromhidrosis or body odor (also called bromidrosis, osmidrosis and ozochrotia) is the smell of bacteria growing on the body. These bacteria multiply considerably in the presence of sweat, but sweat itself is almost totally odourless. Body odor is largely influenced by the major histocompatibility complex (MHC) molecules. These are genetically determined and play an important role in immunity of the organism. Hence, body odour is but a genetic defect so no one can actually fault you for having such a smell at all.
To get rid of the milk smell, you should soak the shirt in anti-bacterial detergent and then wash it with a nice-smelling detergent. Repeat this process at least twice. You might want to consider apologising to her about it. You might be surprised at her magnanimous nature and she might even decide to let you keep the shirt as a souvenir. I am sure she understands that it is not your fault the shirt smells like sour milk left in a bacteria colonizing cupboard.
Aunt Agony
Minor changes have been made to control the content in this letter. However no grammatical errors have been corrected and you are viewing this letter in 99% originality.
No Comments Yet
No comments yet.
Comments RSS TrackBack Identifier URI
Leave a comment
